Shit Modders Say

Discussion in 'Modding' started by FaxCelestis, Jun 24, 2012.

  1. FaxCelestis

    FaxCelestis Will Mod for Digglebucks

    In the vein of Shit Girls Say, here is some shit modders say.

    "That's weird."
    "It worked yesterday."
    "I haven't touched that spell in weeks!"
    "This can't possibly be related to that!"
    "No, you can't mod the inventory size."
    "No, you can't make a bag of holding."
    "You must have the wrong version."
    "I thought I fixed that."

    Give me moar!
    DavidB1111, Aegho, OmniNegro and 2 others like this.
  2. Kazeto

    Kazeto Member

    "It's something Fax made."
    Aegho, OmniNegro and FaxCelestis like this.
  3. LionsDen

    LionsDen Member

    "That works HOW!??!?"
    Kazeto, Aegho and OmniNegro like this.
  4. FaxCelestis

    FaxCelestis Will Mod for Digglebucks

    "Wait, what do you mean requirebuffontrigger doesn't work that way?"
  5. Null

    Null Will Mod for Digglebucks

    I forgot a semicolon closing /
  6. lccorp2

    lccorp2 Member

    "Posting 'help i crash' isn't going to make it easier for me to solve your problem, you know."
    Aegho, OmniNegro and TheJadedMieu like this.
  7. Essence

    Essence Will Mod for Digglebucks

    "Dude, you can do that?"

    "We need more XML hooks"

    "Why doesn't this work in <buff> tags?!?"

    "Fax...that's evil."

    "Null...that's too clever by half."

    "Ruigi...that's cool."


    "You can do that, but it's going to require multiple buffs that do nothing but sit there and act as filters to determine when what can trigger."

    "We'll have to ask Nicholas/David/one of the Chrises."

    "I've got this all coded up, I just need art."

    "I've got all this sweet art, I just need code for it."

    "I haven't had time to playtest this, but it should work."

    "Seriously, you don't need to know how to code -- just start messing with stuff."

    "No, seriously -- BERGSTROOOOOOOOOOOOMM!!!"
    Aegho, OmniNegro, Ruigi and 2 others like this.
  8. banjo2E

    banjo2E Member

    "What do you mean, that template has a hole in the middle?"
    TheJadedMieu, Aegho, Ruigi and 3 others like this.
  9. FaxCelestis

    FaxCelestis Will Mod for Digglebucks

    "That's hardcoded."
    Kazeto, TheJadedMieu, Aegho and 2 others like this.
  10. banjo2E

    banjo2E Member

    "Lockpicks don't actually exist."
  11. Ruigi

    Ruigi Will Mod for Digglebucks

    pretty much this.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  12. OmniaNigrum

    OmniaNigrum Member

    This topic is pure win. :)

    Prepare for more like-spam.

    And to remain on topic...

    "I cannot duplicate that problem." / "It works fine for me."

    "What version of the game and what OS?" (Seriously I wish people would bother to think to include that by default when they report problems.)
  13. OmniaNigrum

    OmniaNigrum Member

    I think we also need to remember the difference between modders and would-be-modders.

    The would-bes say things that come out as follows:
    "Can someone hold my hand and write everything I want that ruins the game and makes everyone in the world want me dead? And make it sparkle more too?" :p

    Real modders say things like "While I was trying to rebalance this to make it sparkle more since TEN BILLION RETARDS DEMANDED SPARKLES I noticed this little problem. I cannot find a better way to do this. Anyone have an idea?" (Code example follows that.)

    I know I am an ass, but you hardcore modders know it is the truth. We love you for holding your ground against the sparklers.
  14. lccorp2

    lccorp2 Member

    "Oh god, this is so stupid. But so awesome."

    "They're going to hate me for cluttering up their inventories..."

    "Now where am I going to get the art for this?"

    "I'm not particularly concerned with things on floor one being one-shot."

    "If you say it's unbalanced, say WHY you think it's unbalanced."


    "I just got this really crazy room idea. Let me show you this..."

    "I think it's a little obvious that I've a soft spot for dragons."

    "You know, Maybe I'll recolour all the raven sprites and make a line of white doves. Or blue birds of happiness. They will do righteous and toxic damage for being sickly sweet."

    "Yeah, I didn't know that was possible, but looking at Archmage, it seems to work..."
    TheJadedMieu, Kazeto, Aegho and 3 others like this.
  15. TSED

    TSED Member

    "Huh. Where'd this desktop come from?"
    Essence likes this.
  16. Aegho

    Aegho Member

    "You can do that, but you have to go through this ridiculously convoluted set of workarounds".


    "You just have to pass it through a few filters."

    "I'm not sure if you can do that, but you can try doing this [example follows]"-

    "Why the hell does this target spell cause resist messages from every enemy and corpse on the screen for seemingly no reason?" (I say this to myself occasionally, one of the circus freak clown combat procs does this).

    Beginner modders say stuff like:

    "Why doesn't this work?"

    "Help, it's crashing and I don't know why!"

    "It won't let me upload it to the workshop".

    "Why doesn't the skill show up in game?"
    Kazeto likes this.
  17. mining

    mining Member

    !which works doesn't

    "Yeah, thats easy. All you need to do is drive 3 miles down the highway, take your first left, climb up the tree, whistle Beethoven's 5th, tear off a branch and then you get to the slightly tricky bit where you have to..."
    OmniNegro likes this.
  18. Essence

    Essence Will Mod for Digglebucks

    (BTW, in case it's not clear, those people yelling for r_b_b are yelling for help…it's the people yelling at Fax that are pissed. ;)
    OmniNegro, Lorrelian, Aegho and 2 others like this.
  19. Dray`Gon

    Dray`Gon Member

    Whomever came up with the idea of sparkling vampires should be dragged into the street, shot, run over a few times with a mac truck, bagged up, run through a grinder, and set ablaze to total incineration. I don't even like vampires and I know enough that sparkling ones shouldn't even remotely exist in any stretch of the imagination.

    Oh, modder quotes. Right!

    I'm a little busy with a secret project but I will certainly update my mod when it's done.

    You never know just how broken your mod is until you post it up where millions upon millions can download and break it.

    Essence is a bad***. (Filtered as I don't even like to type out a curse)

    I hadn't touch that in so long, I pretty much forgot about it.
    Aegho and OmniNegro like this.
  20. banjo2E

    banjo2E Member

    Vlad the Impaler, one of the greatest villains of his time, spawned one of the most famous vampire legends. After several centuries of time and distance, the most common perception of vampires is bishies who sparkle in the sunlight.

    ADOLF HITLER, one of the greatest villains of his time...
    Kazeto, FaxCelestis and Essence like this.