You know you've played too much DoD when......

Discussion in 'Dungeons of Dredmor General' started by Warlock, Aug 23, 2012.

  1. Warlock

    Warlock Member

    A lot of forums dedicated to a particular game series tend to contain threads like this. They're mostly silly and are just for fun, and since that's the kind of thing people like us (and by extension, Gaslamp) like, why not start one dedicated to Dungeons of Dredmor? To start things off:

    You fiddle with a vending machine in the hope of getting free stuff
    You run around drinking all the water from birdbaths hoping to find a Crownstar addendum at the bottom
    You walk into your dog thinking you'll switch places with him
    You call your local shopkeeper Brax.
    You look suspiciously at every tree nearby thinking one might be a fruit treant
    You swear off eating potatoes and rutabagas because you're afraid of food poisoning or an aethereal missile going off in your stomach
    You pour some acid on top of a bunch of mushrooms and are disappointed you didn't get any Grog
    You stick a paper drill cone on top of your pet bird and call it a Diggle
    Every time you get hurt you try eating a lot to get better quickly (works IRL too, just slower)
    You drink alcohol and run around muttering gibberish and waving your hands about hoping to cast spells
    You throw a piece of metal wire at someone and expect to freeze them in place
    and this is just the beginning. :) Post to contribute!
    OmniNegro and iamcreasy like this.
  2. Maxumym

    Maxumym Member

    You exclaim "SKOL!" when you buy fish in a shop.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  3. Warlock

    Warlock Member

    some more:

    you put on a sombrero and wonder why you don't feel smarter
    you cut down random trees in the hope of acquiring THE LOG
    you put a traffic cone on your head and then wonder why you don't find it any easier to dodge someone hitting you
    you put on a bathrobe pretending that it's a cloak of Sagan
    You put four eggs into a waffle press and wonder why you get a mess instead of a perfectly fine deep omelet
    Whenever you throw a snowball in someone's face, you yell 'haywire'
    you look at gargoyles in a church and are afraid they'll blast you with arrows, acid, fire, or god knows what
    you put a tile in front of a hole in the wall and call it a robo-bolt trigger
    you make a scale model of your current dungeon using lego bricks
    You wonder why you don't see funny descriptions added on to stuff in real life
    ok, I'm all out for now.
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  4. BMandFighter

    BMandFighter Member

    You expect drunk guys to be wearing pointy hats and funny robes.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  5. Wolg

    Wolg Member

    You've already chosen your epitaph, and it makes no sense at all to ordinary folks. (He flailed like a sombrero)
    OmniNegro likes this.
  6. Turbo164

    Turbo164 Member

    You kick down doors. When people ask why, you say "Because I'm not a Burglar!"
    OmniNegro and Doc Gelegentlich like this.
  7. Aegho

    Aegho Member

    You look forward to starting over with a new skill combination when you die.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  8. MasterShizzle

    MasterShizzle Member

    ... you eat all your food standing up, in one huge bite, wherever you happen to get hungry

    ... you make omelettes with only one egg (the one that's been in your backpack for two weeks), but use three full cups of grated cheese

    ... you strap a variety of steaks onto your clothing in the hopes that it'll make you live longer

    ... you press the "1" button on elevators, always expecting them to go to the top floor

    ... you try to climb into angry lion cages at the zoo, proudly telling the staff that "It's okay, I'm a Vegan"
  9. Lucentdepths

    Lucentdepths Member

    You spend your spare non-game time thinking about and posting such dredmor related banter as this on dredmor related forums.

    Also you troll said forums too. You're life revolves around that dark diggle master.

    Also also, an omelette of 1 egg and 3 cups of cheese sounds delicious.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  10. MidMorning

    MidMorning Member

    You become an Archaeologist so you can get more exp.

    You carry around an "alchemy kit" and think it doesn't look suspicious whatsoever.

    When you think dual wielding shields is a good idea.

    And when you think your backpack has room for 30 different swords, and think you'll move unimpeded from said swords being hauled around with you at all times.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  11. Wolg

    Wolg Member

    ...You completely forget how to punch. Boxing becomes totally incomprehensible to you.

    ...You start searching for your city's chapter of the Bolt Council.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  12. Warlock

    Warlock Member

    some more:

    You drink some mouthwash after mixing in the juice of a lemon and are disappointed you don't get the Syzygy buff
    You drink eggnog and wonder why you haven't been turned into a Diggle
    You swear off eating eggs because you're afraid angry diggles will come after you for eating their young
    You're afraid of drinking a gin and tonic because you don't want a genie to come after you
    OmniNegro likes this.
  13. Wolg

    Wolg Member believe your calculus professor can teleport.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  14. scotherns

    scotherns Member

    You wave your empty beer glass around and say 'I need more mana' in the hope that someone will fetch you a refill.
    OmniNegro likes this.
  15. OmniaNigrum

    OmniaNigrum Member

    ... :(

    Who told?
    Turbo164 likes this.
  16. Wolg

    Wolg Member start investigating products for hair growth; not for your scalp, but because you think your eyebrows are too small.
    Turbo164 and OmniNegro like this.